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Amy Schumer Explains Why Women Don’t Watch Porn

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PORN AND WOMEN? WHY CAN’T YOU JUST GET ALONG?

Yes, it’s time to once again open this awful can of worms that is: Why don’t more women watch porn?

Though the industry has tried time and time again to get more women watching porn, none of their harebrained schemes ever seem to stick.

Lately, I’ve been watching Comedy Central’s Inside Amy Schumer, because Amy Schumer is fabulous and funny. If you’re not watching Inside Amy Schumer, get it together and start watching the show because it’s awesome.

But more importantly, my recent Inside Amy Schumer binge has caused me to revisit some of Amy Schumer’s stand-up and I think Amy Schumer has the explanation for why more women don’t watch porn…

Her explanation for why women don’t watch porn goes from the start of the video til about 1:18, but do yourself a favor and watch the whole thing:

Ah. Of course. Could it be that the cumshot is what alienates women from porn?

There’s no question that cumming in a woman’s face is an act of agression/domination, so it’s no wonder why women would be turned off by this stock ending. And why even watch porn if you know that in 5 to 20 minutes, it’s just going to end with a cumshot in the face? Wouldn’t you just be better off recalling some hot sex from your past or using your imagination to arouse yourself than seeking something that’s aggressive and kind of gross?

Now some of you hardcore porn fans might be saying, “Ummm…excuse me Amy Schumer, but not all porn ends with a cumshot to the face. Sometimes there’s a cumshot to the chest, or on the ass, or the stomach.” Well, you are right but the variation on the body part doesn’t really change anything.

I tried to do a little research on the history of cumshots, specifically how they became a convention in straight and gay porn.

The very first cumshot in porn can be traced back to 1972′s Deep Throat, arguably the most influential porn movie in history. Film studies professor at UC Berkeley Linda Williams explained in her book Hard Core: Power, Pleasure and the Frenzy of the Visible that Deep Throat, “introduced narrativity in the genre and coined the cum shot as its defining figure…Where the earlier short, silent stag films occasionally included spectacles of external ejaculation (in some cases inadvertently), it was not until the early seventies, with the rise of the hard-core feature, that the money shot assumed the narrative function of signalling the climax of a genital event.”

And as far as how the cumshot exploded with popularity, Lisa Jean Moore, author of Sperm Counts: Overcome by Man’s Most Precious Fluid explains that, “It has to do with the real physiology of orgasm and ejaculation,” says  “The way that male orgasm is external, as opposed to female orgasm, which is internal, it sort of lends itself well to cinematic capture.”

Aight. Aight. That sounds right I guess? The explanation I’ve always received for why the cumshot is a convention in modern pornography is because it’s a way of communicating to the audience that what they’re seeing is real. And ultimately, that is a bad thing because what you’re seeing is not real. It’s not real sex, it’s not a real orgasm. It’s all a big show. Porn is more like performance art than real sex. Is it possible that the cumshot is the root of why so many stupid, stupid men think porn is real sex? Because they see the seminal fluid fall on the face of some poor porn actress and assume that it’s real? I don’t know, but it’s important to raise questions like these.

Anyways, Amy Schumer’s joke is what’s inspired this latest poll:

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I have to wear my glasses when I go to the theater. If you want to reach me directly, email me at chicodustyblog@gmail.com, add me to your circles on Google+ or Tweet at me on Twitter.

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