Office sex! Everyone’s doing it! Or at least 54% of people are doing it, according to an office sex study by Business Insider that came out in May.
For those of us who are more accustomed to working in an office as opposed to banging in one, office sex seems daunting. For example, if I were to have sex in the office, I wouldn’t know where to do it because my office is an open concept loft with lots of windows. It’s a very nice office but I wouldn’t feel comfortable having sex in the office because there’s no where to go for privacy. Sorry I’m such a sensitive lover and not a crazy exhibitionist.
If you’re like me and you don’t know where you would have sex in the office should the opportunity ever arise, then today’s your lucky day. EliteSingles, a UK dating service, has just published a study that examines the most popular places to have sex in an office.
According to the EliteSingles study, 56% of women and 61% of men have sexual fantasies about co-workers and sex in the office. However, only 21% of women and 52% of men say that they would actually go through with their sex in the office fantasy. I wonder if these hesitant prudes also work in open concept loft office spaces.
So those numbers are super disappointing but the real goods of the EliteSingles study is where men and women thought were the best places to have sex in non-open concept loft offices.
Let’s all look at the best places to have sex in the office infographic:
As you can see, the majority of men are drawn to sex in the storage room and the majority of women would have sex in the conference room. Sex in the smoking area was the least popular among both sexes.
All of these locations are viable options for office sex, but before you tell your sexy boss to meet you in the storage room for some afternoon quickie sex, I’d like to tell you pro’s and con’s of having sex in each of these office locations:
Sex in the kitchen
Pro: There’s lots to eat to refuel after sex.
Con: If you cum on someone’s special dietetic lunch, you’ll be in a lot of trouble.
Sex in the bathroom
Pro: Privacy is assured.
Con: Hogging the bathroom for sex will create animosity from coworkers that need to go.
Sex on the photocopier
Pro: Turn the photocopier on and make a souvenir of your office romp.
Con: Broken glass in your butt.
Sex in the elevator
Pro: Again, privacy.
Con: You might end up trapping yourself in the elevator for hours.
Sex at your desk
Pro: It’s your space within the office so you might be very comfortable.
Con: You never know when someone’s going to barge in to chew you out for filing incomplete paperwork or whatever happens in real offices.
Sex in the conference room
Pro: No one is ever in there, nor does anyone ever have a reason to go in there.
Con: Anyone still in the office will know what you’re doing once those blinds close.
Sex in the smoking area
Pro: You can smoke.
Con: You’ll probably get arrested for indecent exposure.
Sex in the storage room
Pro: Cold, dark, lots of hiding places. Very discreet.
Con: Your sex could get out of control, thus knocking over everything in storage, costing the company millions.
So I hope these pro’s and con’s will help you find your best spot to have sex in the office.
Please feel free to share any office sex stories or office sex locations in the comments!
Now get to boosting those sex in the office numbers.