Erectile Dysfunction Etiquette
Erectile dysfunction can happen to any man and if it hasn’t happened yet, your time is coming soon.
There are a number of ways that you can avert erectile dysfunction such as watching what you eat, maintaining a healthy weight, avoiding high blood pressure and cholesterol, getting regular exercise, curbing stress, quitting smoking, and not getting too drunk. However, even if you take all these steps to prevent erectile dysfunction, it can still happen.
So what are you supposed to do when you can’t get it up?
Today, we’re going to be reviewing the Do’s and Don’ts of Erectile Dysfunction Etiquette. So if your penis ever fails to get hard during sex with a hot babe, you’ll be prepared to handle it like a pro.
The biggest mistake men make when their penises don’t get hard is to blame the woman they’re with.
DON’T EVER BLAME YOUR ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION ON A WOMAN THAT’S TRYING TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU.
I totally understand why men are so quick to blame women for erectile dysfunction. A flaccid penis is a terrible thing and it’s embarrassing when it can’t get hard. So to save face, men be like, “Yo. I usually get lots of erections. Something must be wrong with you!”
Don’t ever do this.
Sex isn’t a competition. The woman you’re with isn’t an adversary. She’s just trying to get a piece too! Blaming your erectile dysfunction on your partner only causes more problems. She might think she’s not sexy (which is definitely not the case) and lose confidence. Or worse, she’ll get mad and rip your dick off.
Just don’t blame it on someone else.
When your penis can’t get hard, the best thing to do is to own it. It’s your body after all. Even though it’s humiliating, taking responsibility for your impotence is the best thing you can do. Sorry. I know that’s not what you wanted to hear but it’s the truth. Like in life, denial and displacement are just a step behind acceptance. So why not skip the denial and go straight to acceptance?
Owning up to impotence is a great test of character for your partner too. If you say, “Listen. I don’t know what’s wrong with me tonight but my penis is just not getting hard,” and before you’re done speaking she’s already dressed and hailing a cab outside, you’re probably better off without her.
More often than not, the woman you’re with will want to help you get it up. As I’ve said before, she probably wants to have sex with you as much as you want to have sex with her. You might hear, “Is there anything I can do to help?”, that’s your opportunity to turn erectile dysfunction into your sexual experimentation. Turn the negative into a positive.
Maybe you like lap-dances. Maybe you’re an anal sex guy. Maybe you want to tied up and blind-folded. Maybe you want to watch her masturbate and orgasm. I don’t know! Whatever your deepest, darkest sexual desires are, this is your chance to try something new and exciting. Because remember, you’re not competing against each other. You’re both trying to have sex at any cost.
You never know. Maybe you’re not getting hard because you’re too accustomed to your sex routine. So why not take this opportunity to jump-start your sex life and your penis.
In other words, DO USE YOUR ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION TO EXPERIMENT SEXUALLY.
Personally, I’ve struggled with erectile dysfunction after a few too many Tom Collins. What can I say? It’s hard to get hard when the room is spinning and all I’m thinking is, “Don’t throw up on this fly mamacita.”
Whenever I find myself too drunk to fuck, I just own up to it. I say in a very slurred manner, “Look. I’m too drunk. It’s not going to happen tonight. Let’s just go to sleep and we’ll have sex when we wake up.”
I’ve yet to have a lady get mad at me for being honest. Whatever you do, DON’T TRY TO HAVE SEX WITH YOUR FLACCID PENIS. It doesn’t feel good for anyone and it’s a complete waste of time.
There’s an elephant in the room and it’s your limp penis. It’s always better to address it and admit that it’s not going to happen. If you’re up front about your presently flaccid penis, your partner will be more willing to reschedule the sex for morning (or another night). DO RESCHEDULE THE SEX.
One definition of insanity is trying the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. You know who defined insanity that way? Albert Einstein. So you know it’s true. Trying to get hard over and over again and not getting any results is insane. There’s no shame in throwing in the towel early because your body may just need some rest before it can send blood to your penis.
After a goodnight’s sleep and some sunlight creeping into the bedroom, try and get hard again. These slight changes to your environment could be the key to getting it up.
Ultimately, all good sex comes from honest communication and erectile dysfunction is no different. Erectile dysfunction will happen to every man at one point in his life. All you have to remember is to own up to it. It might not be getting hard now, but it will get hard again. Just remember…
DON’T BLAME YOUR ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION ON ANYONE BUT YOURSELF.
DON’T TRY TO HAVE SEX WITH YOUR FLACCID PENIS.
DO SEXUAL EXPERIMENTATION WHEN YOU CAN’T GET HARD.
DO RESCHEDULE THE SEX.
Now you know how to handle yourself should your penis fail to get erect.
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