How To Hook-Up At A Wedding
At a wedding, there’s always a sex-guarantee…for the bride and the groom…
But did you know that 63% of wedding guests have had a hook-up at a wedding? There is no social event that is more conducive to sex or hooking than weddings. Not even an aphrodisiac party can get you action like a wedding can. Love is in the air, everyone is dressed to the nines and by the end of the night (or during the ceremony) people just want to have as much fun as possible.
What could be more fun than hooking-up at a wedding? NOTHING.
With wedding season in full-swing, I would be doing you all a disservice if I didn’t help you get into that 63% of people who have had hooking-up at a wedding. So let’s see how you’re going to hook-up at a wedding this summer.
Step 1 – Know the wedding inside and out
First of all, I’d like to address wedding crashing. It’s pretty darn risky. If you think you can pull off faking a connection to the bride or groom, then go for it. Otherwise, leave it to the movies.
Whether you plan on crashing a wedding or if you’ve been invited, if you’re looking to hook-up at a wedding you better try to know it inside and out. The better you know the details of the wedding, the more likely you are to hook up with the hot bridesmaid.
All weddings are different. Some will be open bar, some will have no liquor. Some weddings will be mostly dinner and no dancing, others will be big parties. It’s important to know what the couple has planned so that you can make adjustments to your approach accordingly.
If you can, try to find out who is coming. An old high school flame who just recently got divorced might be there, ready to hook up with someone. And if you know that old high school flame is going to be there, you focus your attention on her and not someone else.
When you’re finding out who might be attending the wedding, you’re also going to want to know which guests might be off-limits. The bride and groom are for sure off-limits, but there might be others. For example the bride’s older, hotter sister could be recovering from a cyst on her uterine wall and she’s just not feeling too sexy. This is the type of thing that you should discreetly find out about so that your wedding hook up can be efficient.
Step 2 – Come alone
Going anywhere alone can be a little weird but if you bring anyone to a wedding, you probably won’t hook-up at a wedding because other guests will think that you’re together. Going stag to a wedding sends the message to other single guests that you’re available.
Step 3 – Hit the bar
After some hellos, dinner, whatever, make sure you plant yourself at the bar for a little bit. Don’t go straight to the bar because you’re alone. Going straight to the bar while you’re alone will draw negative attention your way, which you don’t want. Hitting the bar is a crucial step in finding a hook-up at a wedding. Obviously, a drink will loosen you up (remember: don’t get too drunk, just get loose).
The bar is the perfect place to chill for a bit. You don’t want to be there all night, but you do want to spend some time there because the cuties will be coming up for drinks. While they’re waiting to be served, this is the time for you to say hello, chat them up a bit, and feel whether or not there’s a spark.
Step 4 – Look good
You’re going to a wedding. You’re want to hook-up at a wedding. You can’t just wear your tuxedo t-shirt with your favorite top-hat. You need to wear a real tuxedo. Just like good. Dressing up nice can give you confidence to approach women (or men) that you may not normally in your regular bummy clothes.
Looking good goes beyond clothes. Looking good is also giving off good vibes, which means make sure that you’re body language is communicating positivity. No slouching with your arms crossed or starring into the endless void of your iPhone. Be talkative, smile, and get involved with the wedding festivities (including the dancefloor, sorry).
Step 5 – Keep it casual
Unlike the people who are getting married, the wedding hook-up you’re looking to have is not forever. Finding someone to hook-up with at a wedding isn’t like hooking up in a club. There are a finite amount of guests so you can’t let yourself be too picky. If you’re attracted to someone and you’re pretty sure they’re reciprocating, just go for it! Don’t wait around for someone better because it’s not going to happen. If they’re into you, they’re the right one. You know, casual sex style.
Also, be casual with your intentions. Don’t tell the bride’s grandmother that you’re only there to meet someone to have sex at a wedding with. Don’t tell anyone what you’re really there for. Keep it casual, you dummy!
So there you go, that’s how you’re going to hook-up at a wedding this wedding season.
In my own experience, the actual wedding does more to put single women in the mood than anything you could possibly do. So just be there, be casual, look good, have a drink, and keep your eyes peeled because sooner or later your wedding hook-up is going to be coming at you like a heat-seeking missile.
And single ladies, remember, straight single men will have sex with you whenever you want. So just go over to the one you like best and say, “What’s up? Want to hook-up?” and you’ll be all set.