A few years ago, a lot of my friends who had been in relationships started to get married. One by one, I heard boring proposal story after boring proposal story while I impatiently waited to hear when I would be able to break up my tux and drunkenly throw up all over it.
At the time, I couldn’t understand why people got married. Actually, come to think of it, I still don’t understand why people get married. However, I have figured out why people have weddings.
At first I thought it was an attention grab. A desperate plea for gifts and money spent on them all in the name of love. But then it soon dawned on me that it’s true that every single newly wed couple absolutely needs at least three different toaster ovens, the reason people have weddings is because it serves as a farewell.
Goodbye forever friend I once knew for the monotony of monogamy will wear you down until I hardly recognize ye anymore. And unsurprisingly, the monotony of monogamy doesn’t just leave people shells of their former selves, it also drives people to cheat.
According to a new 2000 user survey by AshleyMadison.com (the only dating website that cater to people looking to cheat on their spouses/significant others), 36% of men cheat simply because they’re not having enough sex. Meanwhile, 29% said a lack of intimacy led them to try cheating and 19% attributed their infidelity to lack of excitement.
Though their words are chosen carefully, sex, intimacy and excitement are all euphemisms for one thing in my lexicon: FUCKING.
“People cheat because their physical or emotional needs are not being met and a biological drive in each and every one of us can push us to seek out change,” says Noel Biderman, CEO of AshleyMadison.com.
“It comes down to human nature. It is not in our DNA to be monogamous.”
So now you know. The reason men cheat on their significant others is because they’re simply lacking in sex, intimacy and excitement. Which means if wives want to keep their husbands from screwing around, you need to be proactive in the bedroom and experiment. Follow this simple formula…
Sexual experimentation leads to excitement, sharing an exciting new sexual experience leads to intimacy, intimacy leads to more sex. BOOM. I just saved your damn marriage.
Alternatively, you can just dive head first into an open marriage or become swingers.
But that’s only if you want to stay married.
[h/t: Times Lives]