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Man Stupidly Pays for Fake Penis Enlargement Products

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OK, you’re on Sex.com, so I already know you look at porn all day – you don’t have to throw up some false pretence as to why you’ve seen millions and millions of those spammy penis enlargement product ads plastered all over the internet.

But have any of you ever been short-sighted enough to actually go ahead and order those penis enlargement supplements that promise to turn you from average-Joe-six-incher into Ron Jeremy himself? I hope for your sake that the answer is no, yet I’m skeptical.

Here’s the thing – though the vast majority of those ads are huge scams meant to feed into men’s insecurities about their dong size, they must make ad revenue or else you wouldn’t see them everywhere.  SOMEBODY must be buying those products, but I like to think that the average Sex.com user is smart enough not to. But, even if you do for some reason give all of your credit card and shipping information to a dubious online entity, most of the time the worst thing that will happen is that they’ll send you some fake herbal supplements that don’t really do anything, or some other crappy product.

Some dude got a pretty hilarious surprise recently though.  He bought one of those fake penis enlargement products and probably waited eagerly, panting at his mail slot for weeks waiting for the miracle cure that would finally turn him into a 10-inched stud so he could please his wife…the package finally came, one glorious, sunny beautiful morning, and the guy in a fit of excitement and passion ripped off all of the packaging, opened up the box, poured out all of the packing foam, and discovered…A MAGNIFYING GLASS.

Whoever was running that site had a pretty funny sense of humor, and I commend them.

So what’s the moral of the story?

We repeat it all of the time on this blog: don’t worry about your dick size, dude.  It’s not about how big it is, it’s about how you use it.  Filling your body with strange chemicals and supplements isn’t going to make a noticeable difference, so instead of wasting all of that time and money on get-big-quick schemes, why not devote some time to learning how to use your penis properly or alternatively figuring out another way to please your partner?

Luckily for you, I have a fool-proof scheme that will make your penis big and hard, right away, and its totally free!  Look at porn pictures, gifs and videos on Sex.com and you’ll notice your penis almost double in size!  Here are some samples to get you started.

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My name is Gil Powers. I am an extremely, extremely underrated lover and the shortest/fattest man to ever play in the NBA. I like long walks to the 7/11 and watching reality TV show marathons.

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