What exactly does growing a mustache have to do with raising awareness for prostate cancer?
The whole idea behind Movember is to “change the face of men’s health”. I guess they accomplish it by making every man look slightly worse for an entire month.
This Movember, if you don’t feel like looking terrible for a whole month, I have another way you can show your support for prostate cancer research. GIVE YOURSELF A PROSTATE MASSAGE.
If you think you’re ready to have one of the most intense orgasms of your life, please continue reading.
BEFORE attempting to give yourself a prostate massage, please go have your prostate checked out by a medical professional. Because the prostate is inside your body, you don’t really know what state it’s in. It’s not like your dick where you can see it’s shrivelled up and useless. So before you start playing with your prostate, go make sure that it’s healthy and ready to be played with. Plus, the prostate exam will give you a good idea of how it feels to have a finger up your butt and where your prostate is located.
Once your prostate has been cleared for contact by a medical professional, prepare for your prostate massage by emptying your bladder and bowels, trimming your finger nails, washing your hands and anus. If you want, you can wax your butt hairs or bleach the hole, however these steps aren’t 100% necessary.
After taking care of your hygiene, get into a comfortable position where you can comfortably reach your anus. Your hand will work just fine, but if you’re so inclined feel free to use a prostate massaging sex toy.
Now, there are two ways to stimulate your prostate.
1) Massage the taint (FYI, the taint is the area between the anus and the scrotum). This may not result in an orgasm, but it might feel good.
2) Stimulate the prostate internally.
To stimulate the prostate internally, lube up your finger or prostate massaging sex toy and insert it up your own butt. Keep going until you feel the prostate gland. It’s about the size of a walnut and it feels like a little rubber ball. Gently massage the sides of the prostate. Don’t go straight for the middle! The middle of the prostate is covered in sensitive nerves and it might be painful to tickle.
Keep massaging the sides of the glands. You should feel very aroused as you’re stimulating the male G-Spot. And then just like regular masturbation, you’ll cum suddenly and panic to clean up the semen before it dries.
Massaging your prostate doesn’t just give you an intense orgasm. Doing it regularly will make your prostate stronger and healthier. Your sex drive will increase, you’ll have better bladder control, improved circulation, and your prostate will detoxify itself all thanks to prostate massages.
So this Movember, you could grow a mustache to remind everyone that you look terrible with a mustache. OR you can give yourself a prostate massage to improve your prostate’s health and have mind-blowing orgasms.
The choice is yours.