Since 1969, everyone’s known that Virginia is for lovers, which is strange because blowjobs, cunnilingus, and anal sex were illegal up until yesterday.
I guess the slogan should have been “Virginia is for boring lovers”.
Virginia’s House of Delegates passed a bill yesterday that will eliminate a ban on oral and anal sex that’s been around since 1950.
The old ban states:
A. If any person carnally knows in any manner any brute animal, or carnally knows any male or female person by the anus or by or with the mouth, or voluntarily submits to such carnal knowledge, he or she shall be guilty of a Class 6 felony, except as provided in subsection B.
B. Any person who performs or causes to be performed cunnilingus, fellatio, anilingus or anal intercourse upon or by his daughter or granddaughter, son or grandson, brother or sister, or father or mother is guilty of a Class 5 felony. However, if a parent or grandparent commits any such act with his child or grandchild and such child or grandchild is at least 13 but less than 18 years of age at the time of the offense, such parent or grandparent is guilty of a Class 3 felony.
C. For the purposes of this section, parent includes step-parent, grandparent includes step-grandparent, child includes step-child and grandchild includes step-grandchild.
A felony! Up until yesterday, blowjobs, cunnilingus, and anal sex were almost as bad as murder, kidnapping, and treason. It is Even married couples couldn’t enjoy oral and anal sex.
The law has been under fire since the 2003 Supreme Court ruling Lawrence v. Texas, which held that any state could not ban private non-commercial sex between two consenting adults. But that didn’t stop Virginia’s legislators from killing any updates to the bill until yesterday.
Though I’m happy for what this bill represents, I can’t imagine that the law had ever been enforced. Like did police ever burst into a bedroom to arrest a couple for anal sex when really the guy was just trying to find the pussy but poked the ass accidentally?
So if you’re in Virginia, please celebrate your new found sexual freedom by going down on somebody or giving up the butt!
Though since you’ve probably never had oral or anal sex because you’re a law-abiding Virginia, you might want to read these: