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Penisless* Rapper Christ Bearer Wants to Star in Pornos

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*formerly penisless, that is.

In today’s WTF gruesome moment of the day, formerly Wu-Tang Clan affiliated rapper Christ Bearer claims that he’d like to act in some adult films.  At first, this might not seem very surprising: a musician/semi-celebrity who isn’t exactly relevant any more that wants to get their name back in the press and make some money by entering the adult industry.  For other washed up celebs following this path, please see almost any celebrity sex tape, with an extra focus on ‘teen mom’ Farrah Abraham.

The difference in this case is that Christ Bearer actually WAS in the news recently, but for all of the wrong reasons.  In April of this year, Christ Bearer made headlines by chopping off his own dick with a steak knife in a PCP fuelled craze and then falling off a 2nd story balcony.  Pretty awful shit, right?  That’s why you don’t do PCP.  Shit is fucked up.  If you’re going to smoke stuff stick with smoking weed every second of every day like I do – sometimes I FEEL like jumping off a 2nd story balcony to see what it’d be like, but I never actually go through with it.  What do you think I am, crazy?

Good news for Mr. Bearer, however, as the hospital was able to reattach his penis.  Apparently, it works fine too.  Recently, TMZ caught up with Christ Bearer to ask him about his Franken-junk.  Christ Bearer’s response was pretty funny:

TMZ: Does it work? 
Bearer: “Does it work?!? Can Chris Brown dance? Can Kanye West rant? Can Jay Z fight off a trick?”

You can also check out the video below:

It might seem like this is simply a publicity stunt, or a crazy rapper just shooting off at the mouth and bragging to convince people that his dick actually isn’t all messed up and works fine.  The interesting thing, however is that Steve Hirsh from Vivid Entertainment is actually interested in working with Christ Bearer….as long as he can actually prove that his dick still work good.

I dunno.  I just don’t know.  Don’t do drugs, OK?  That’s what I’m taking away from this whole thing.

If his cock actually works normally, however (or maybe it has taken on superhuman pornstar attributes through a miraculous surgical procedure??), Mr. Bearer can join the long and esteemed list of cross-over porn stars such as those listed below:

2516752 paris hilton Penisless* Rapper Christ Bearer Wants to Star in Pornos
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My name is Gil Powers. I am an extremely, extremely underrated lover and the shortest/fattest man to ever play in the NBA. I like long walks to the 7/11 and watching reality TV show marathons.

Comments

  • polywan

    love is variety ideas and mental but it is strange for every one