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The Porno Dress Code

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005 The Porno Dress Code

The Problem with Sweatpants

Why do sweatpants always get such a bad rep? You wear sweatpants one time and everyone’s against you. It’s like people want to shame you for wanting to be as comfortable as possible.

Wearing sweatpants to work is always the worst. For some reason they aren’t considered “appropriate” or “professional”. Strangely enough, the “No Sweatpants At Work” rule not only applies to most businesses, government offices, and restaurants, it also applies to porn sets.

As I was doing my regular browsing for sex and porn news and or gossip, I came across one of the most ridiculous anecdotes I’ve ever heard via the blog I Shoot Porn.

Now I should say that I Shoot Porn was skeptical about posting this anecdote because he didn’t want to put anyone on blast and neither do I, but it’s too silly not share. I Shoot Porn, I’m sorry if this bums you out but I couldn’t help it.

So this is what you need to know:

I Shoot Porn‘s studio is in a rough area of East L.A. The studio opens up to an alley where the locals can score crack, shoot people, or dumb a dead body. Certainly, it’s not ideal for most people but when you’re working in the adult industry, privacy can be paramount.

And where there’s a lot of crime, it’s easy to have privacy doing legal yet slightly immoral things (like filming porn movies).

While everyone in the industry knows about the sketchy alley, it’s never been a problem until the Porno Princess arrived.

Here’s how it usually goes down when a girl shows up to the porn studio:

girl comes in, and if it’s her first time, I comment about the alley, then I show her into the space, and I go over where drinks are (this is when I point to the 5 gallon water cooler and the dorm-room fridge, where all the Arizona Ice Tea products are (I’m not a fan of soda)), and the rules with the bathroom (no flushing tampons or lotsa baby wipes, cause my drain is sensitive); then I introduce Porno Princess to Maggie (the wonder dog who’s seen more live sex acts committed than any other dog on the planet), The Minion (my trusty helper), and my make-up artist, who sits Porno Princess down and asks her girly questions about make-up and shit.

However this time around the Porno Princess freaked out and wanted to bail. So they got the agent on the phone and he explained:

She doesn’t feel comfortable there. She doesn’t like the environment. She also said someone is there in sweats, and she doesn’t think that’s appropriate for a workplace. She just thinks it’s all beneath her.

Now surely the real reason for wanting to bail was drug-related paranoia or actually feeling unsafe in East L.A., but calling someone out for wearing sweatpants at the porn studio is absolutely ridiculous. Sure, maybe sweatpants aren’t the most appropriate for traditional workplaces but let’s just look at some pornstars generally wear for work:

Leather Bustier:

2426275 hot photo with lovely big tits The Porno Dress Code

Source: ma.brazzers.com via redraider706 on Sex.com

NOT APPROPRIATE FOR THE WORKPLACE!

 

Pink Lingerie:

2771925 incredibly sexy The Porno Dress Code

Source: pinterest.com via bourne1966 on Sex.com

NOT APPROPRIATE FOR THE WORKPLACE!

 

Cowboy Hat and Bikini:

906420 sora aoi gangnam style The Porno Dress Code

Source: tokyoteens.tumblr.com via sinlover on Sex.com

NOT APPROPRIATE FOR THE WORKPLACE!

(unless you work as a cowboy on the beach)

 

Fishnet Body Suit

101787 kimberly kato in a sexy fishnet body suit The Porno Dress Code

Source: girls.twistys.com via EBrain on Sex.com

NOT APPROPRIATE FOR THE WORKPLACE!

 

Pencil Skirt with Low-Cut Top

2798598 memphis monroe The Porno Dress Code

Source: pinterest.com via jeremygrey on Sex.com

APPROPRIATE FOR THE WORKPLACE!

 

By and large, what is worn on set for porn movies would not be appropriate workplace attire. The exception being porn movies set in the office or places of business because they need to create the illusion of professionalism before they get down to the sex.

Workplace appropriate clothing doesn’t apply to shooting porn because sooner or later at least one person there is going to be completely nude. How can you expect people to show up in tuxedos if they’re going to be working with a naked person?

Dear Porno Princess, professionalism is all attitude in this business, not sartorial.

But in the end the sweatpants excuse is so lame that it works. I remember once I was trying to get out of going to school so I claimed that I had menopause. Being a young man who didn’t know what menopause was, it was highly unlikely that I actually had menopause. But the excuse was so lame that it ended up working. That’s how I feel about the sweatpants excuse. It’s so lame but it works.

So now I want to ask you again, why do sweatpants get such a bad rep?

Can’t they be sexy?

938392 can sweatpants be sexy The Porno Dress Code
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I have to wear my glasses when I go to the theater. If you want to reach me directly, email me at chicodustyblog@gmail.com, add me to your circles on Google+ or Tweet at me on Twitter.

Comments

  • RANDY

    How many cowboys you know work at the beach?

  • http://www.sex.com Chico Dusty

    Like 5 or 6.

  • dilly

    sweatpants are just like lazy you know? they sexy though

  • Cunt Hands

    I hate to be the one to bring this up, but when you choose the career path in modeling/acting/porn/what ever you want to call it, you kind of give up the right to say that a workplace setting is “beneath you”.

    Not saying all pornstars are sleazy or anything, but really. The only thing that is truly beneath you is someone else’s genitalia.

  • http://www.sex.com Chico Dusty

    Even Klaus Kinski went out to the Amazon with Herzog and they’re two maniacs.

  • http://www.sex.com Chico Dusty

    Oh but they good though. They sexy.

  • oh-shit-its-that-guy

    um sweat pants are hot when they are worn right personally i adore when clothing is tight idk y but it turns me on faster than the actual porn act then i explored tight jeans, yoga pants(sweat pants variation), and school pants obviously worn by girls… then i took my clothing fetish to the next level i looked non nude porn sites of course none to barely a few existed this site has some good material but it mixes in the nude stuff And its hard as hell to find a simple long length video thats completely non nude striptease is ok thats the best i got to long length youtube has some good material but short :-/ i also found short skirts revealing the lowest level point of ass VERY effective!

  • john

    can’t find this dress: http://tinyurl.com/kbrl2la

  • http://www.sex.com/news/ Chico Dusty

    C’mon dog, lay off the spam.

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