Love Guru

  • Everybody loves Guru

    Artist rendering of typical American Love Guru

    When you pay someone to watch you and your significant other have sex in a hotel room, it’s usually some variety of prostitute because you into some of that kinky shit.

    They arrive and the money’s already on the table. He or she says, “What did you have planned for the hour?”

    Then your wife chimes in and says, “We just want you to watch.” Your heart sinks because you’ve been having sex with the same woman for the last thirteen years and last Monday when she suggested you do something crazy with a hooker you thought your luck has finally turned around. Well…that’s 150 dollars that you’ll never see again.

    But now there’s no need to mope! Instead of that greedy prostitute watch you make boring sex on your wife, you can have a trained professional (Love Guru) watch you have sex.

    I know what you’re thinking, “I’d rather have that greedy prostitute with the giant cold-sore on her lip watch me and my wife than some Verne Troyer look-a-like.” Don’t worry, there’s an upside.

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    November 28, 2012 • Sex News • Views: 410