Natalie Portman
Posts

  • What Would Happen if Wes Anderson Made a Porno?

    In an effort to answer the question that nobody in the entire universe has ever asked themselves, some dudes over on the interweb surfing website Youtube have made a parody video:

    The video is made by some dudes who call themselves “Nacho Punch.” Absolutely no research whatsoever on my part has determined that these guys make parody videos for the website called Youtube.

    Wes Anderson is a divisive film-maker. On one hand, his quirky charm often leads to funny ensemble movies like The Royal Tenenbaums and Rushmore. On the other hand, his quirky charm often leads to insufferable garbage like Darjeeling Limited and whatever that movie is where Bill Murray quirks his way around a sub for way too long. QUIRKY.

    While I was doing some research to make this post, I noticed something which would make Wes Anderson directing a porno film very different, especially considering the female-dominated nature of the adult business.  Wes Anderson sparingly uses hot babes in his films.  If you think about it, most of his movies simply involve a bunch of quirky dudes running around causing mischief with a female foil that appears periodically.  What’s the deal Wes Anderson?  Why you gotta play me like that, Wes Anderson?  I expect an all-female cast for the next movie!

    I wonder who Wes Anderson would cast as his leading actresses if he were to make a real erotic film? To help you think about the possibilities, here are naked pictures of some of the celebrity babes that Wes Anderson has employed for some of his non-pornographic regular movies:

    Gwyneth Paltrow

    4223325 gwyneth paltrow imagining your sighs moans erotic cries as What Would Happen if Wes Anderson Made a Porno?

    Source: google.com via Terror Bride on Sex.com

    5798568 gwyneth paltrow What Would Happen if Wes Anderson Made a Porno?
    3400061 gwyneth paltrow two lovers What Would Happen if Wes Anderson Made a Porno?

    Source: Uploaded by user via cam hayes on Sex.com

    Source: blondechicks.markgallery.org via SexyLadiesPics on Sex.com

    2759521 gwyneth paltrow sexy magazines scans What Would Happen if Wes Anderson Made a Porno?

    Source: easycelebritys.com via kcleb on Sex.com

    Natalie Portman

    2662888 natalie portman What Would Happen if Wes Anderson Made a Porno?

    Source: imagefap.com via Logan K on Sex.com

    2389818 natalie portman What Would Happen if Wes Anderson Made a Porno?

    Source: mytasteofwomen.tumblr.com via Hornygenius12 on Sex.com

    5812919 natalie portman black swan What Would Happen if Wes Anderson Made a Porno?

    Source: Uploaded by user via SexyandFun on Sex.com

    Well, you know what, it turns out that Wes Anderson doesn’t actually employ very many sexy actresses. Makes sense considering most of his movies are total circle-jerk bro-fests. Just joking, I like the guy.

    via Jezebel

    May 5, 2014 • Sex News • Views: 19062

  • Top 10 Sexiest Best Actress Oscar Winners of All Time

    JLawrence oscar finger Top 10 Sexiest Best Actress Oscar Winners of All Time

    Damn girl, you bad.

    The 86th Academy Awards are this Sunday! Are you excited?

    I am.

    There’s nothing I like more than tuning in to watch all of Hollywood come together in a glamorous evening to jerk each other off for what feels like an eternity only to cum all over us regular folk.

    The Oscars actually suck. They totally brainwash people. I’ve honestly heard people say, “I didn’t like that movie, but it won an Oscar so it must be good.” What? No. If you didn’t like it, that’s fine. You’re allowed to dislike movies that won Oscars. Unless you can put it on your resume, winning an Oscar don’t mean a damn thing.

    But I will admit that some very sexy women have won the Oscar for Best Actress. So in the spirit of the Oscars, let’s check out the Top 10 Sexiest Best Actress Winners of All TimeContinue Reading

    February 28, 2014 • TOP 10's • Views: 3727

  • What can we learn from 10,000 porn stars?

    John Millward took six months to analyze 10,000 porn star profiles on Internet Adult Film Database to determine who the average porn star was.

    Sounds interesting, right? If only there was a blog that could provide a synopsis of this study with NSFW visual aids. Good news, there is a blog that can provide a synopsis. It’s this blog. The Sex.com Blog.

    Ok, Mr. Millward, what do you have for us?

    Continue Reading

    February 18, 2013 • Porn, Pornstars, Sex News • Views: 7739