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  • Nerd Gets Lap Dance From Rihanna, Sex.com Gets Jealous

    Over the years, the Sex.com Blog staff have professed our love for 1000’s of different sexy babes, but none of our desires burn stronger than our love for Rihanna.

    Ever since Rihanna came out with “Pon de Replay” in 2005, we’ve fantasized about the Barbadian beauty straddling our laps with those long, sexy legs and grinding her perfect body all over us. This fantasy has only escalated in recent years when she became more of an exhibitionist on social media and becoming a bonafide sex symbol.

    I was under the impression that writing creepy blog posts about how much we lust after Rihanna would eventually translate into Rihanna reaching out to us with an invite to an awesome celebrity sex party where me and the rest of the Sex.com gang would get to bang Rihanna and all her famous friends.

    Unfortunately, she has yet to extend an offer.

    Instead of inviting her biggest fans (the Sex.com Blog staff) to an awesome celebrity sex party, Rihanna’s been inviting nerdy fans on stage to receive lap dances in front of thousands of fans. WHY NOT US, RIHANNA?

    Though we’re insanely jealous of the nerd that Rihanna grinded on, we’re at least pleased that she is giving lap dances to fans.

    Watch Rihanna give a lap dance to a nerd below:

    Oh man…

    Doesn’t the way her hips whip back and forth just make your otherwise impotent dick spring to life? And the way Rihanna takes his glasses off and slides it on herself just the best thing you’ve ever seen?

    Meanwhile, the nerd receiving a lap dance from the hottest woman on Earth just goes hover hands on Rihanna and flashes devil horns to the crowd? When Rihanna straddles you, which will probably never happen to you again ever, you need to make the most of that opportunity and cop a feel of that perfect ass. Sure, you’d probably get beaten within an inch of your life by Rihanna’s security, but if you were that close to God, wouldn’t you reach out and touch her? I would. I would in a fucking heart beat.

    Because let’s not forget that Rihanna once sang…

    Come here Rude boy, boy can you get it up? Come her Rude boy, boy is you big enough? Take it. Take it. Baby, baby. Take it, take it. Love me. Love.

    Surely the lyrics to “Rude Boy” are instructions directly from Rihanna that if you are ever lucky enough to be selected to receive a lap dance from her in front of thousands of fans, it’s your duty to show her that you’re big enough and that you will take it, take it, love her, love her. (“Take it” is of course coping a feel of that ass.)

    I guess there’s only one thing for us to do…

    Look at all the Rihanna pictures and GIFs Sex.com users have pinned to their boards.

    Check out Sex.com’s Rihanna pictures and GIFs by clicking the image below:

    1630809 sexy rihanna does hot booty modeling upon the pages of best Nerd Gets Lap Dance From Rihanna, Sex.com Gets Jealous

    July 10, 2014 • Sex, Sex News • Views: 19582

  • Nerdy Jesse Jane Dresses Up And Strips Down

    You know what really bothers me? How some girls think it’s cute to slap on a pair of thick glasses and all of a sudden become nerds. Sorry babes, though you do look great in those thick glasses, you’re not a nerd. To be a nerd you need to be able to tell me what quadrant of space the crew of the USS Voyager gets lost in in Star Trek: Voyager.

    However, hot girls pretending to be nerds isn’t nearly as bad as the hot girls that pretend to love nerds. I think comedian Chelsea Peretti said it best when she said:

    9mM7c Nerdy Jesse Jane Dresses Up And Strips Down

    Yes babes, the handsome guy that used to read comics as a teenager is not a nerd. That handsome guy with an astigmatism is not a nerd, he just wears corrective lenses.

    But in spite of this nuisance, there are some babes that always get a pass. Actions, outfits, labels, doesn’t matter. Whatever they do, we can’t complain about it because it’s touches us on such an erotic level that we can’t even be bothered by it.

    That’s why when Jesse Jane puts on some glasses and declares herself a nerd, it’s really not that bad because IT’S JESSE-FUCKING-JANE.

    If you like girls that pretend to be sexy nerds or you just like blondes with big tits or you’re just a diehard Jesse Jane fan, you’re going to like STRIPLV‘s latest offering.

    STRIPLV presents: Jesse Jane, Nerd.

    Jesse Jane – Nerd from Santodonato on Vimeo.

    Rumor has it that Jesse Jane won’t be doing porn once her Digital Playground contract is up. And while I hope that’s not true for the sake of her loyal fans around the world, y’all better start appreciating this bombshell of a babe while you have the chance!

    …even though she’s not technically a nerd…

    June 24, 2014 • Pictures & Vids, Porn • Views: 14551

  • Tanya Tate Has An Action Figure

    Everyone knows that the UK’s favorite MILF pornstar Tanya Tate has never been afraid to show off her geeky side. After all, there’s a direct correlation between her rise to power and her love of cosplay (though there’s no evidence but I think pretty safe to say when nerds see a busty MILF dressed up like Emma Frost, they become fans for life).

    Given that Tanya Tate is a bonafide nerd, it shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone that she’s leveraged her massive following into creating her very own action figure! But unlike your average action figure, Tanya Tate’s action figure is a customizable blank, vinyl figure, so geeks can use them to create any superhero or pop-culture female figure they want like so:

    20140617142303 Tanya Tate MHT Turn Around Tanya Tate Has An Action Figure

    20140617141917 MHT Concepts Tanya Tate Has An Action Figure

    Isn’t that super cool?

    Production on the Tanya Tate action figure began almost a year ago when Tanya Tate noticed that there were far too few heroic female platform. And now, to finalize the Tanya Tate action figure, she needs your help!

    Tanya Tate has already paid for the design, sculpting and molds. Prototypes have been approved but she still needs $20,000 to start produces these things. Which is why she’s turned to the internet for help with an IndieGogo campaign.

    Of course, $20,000 dollars is a lot to ask of the internet. That’s why Tanya has a bunch of perks for people contributing to the production of the Tanya Tate action figure.

    They are:

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    20140617132413 250a Reward Level My Hero Toys Tanya Tate Has An Action Figure

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    Damn girl, how are can we resist contributing to your IndieGogo campaign with dope incentives like that?

    Personally, I think the Tanya Tate action figure is awesome, so I’m going to contribute to Tanya’s $20,000 goal. If you want to see her action figures become a reality, I strongly suggest you contribute whatever you can here:

    Or you can just hang on to your money, but keep in mind that you’ll be disappointing a gorgeous MILF pornstar. You don’t want to upset this beauty do you?

    5418030 tanya tate Tanya Tate Has An Action Figure

    June 20, 2014 • Porn, Porn News & Highlights, Pornstars • Views: 20570

  • BABES ON INSTAGRAM: April O’Neil

    The other day, I received a lengthy email from a concerned Sex.com Blog reader, which I can surmise in a single question:

    “DID APRIL O’NEIL RETIRE???”

    As you can imagine, the thought that everyone’s favourite sexy nerd and owner of some of the most spectacular breasts the internet has ever seen retiring from porn caused an absolute panic.

    What would we do without April O’Neil? Probably find a way to carry on. Try to fill that April O’Neil sized hole in our hearts with new sexy nerds entering the adult industry, but it wouldn’t be the same.

    Thankfully, I’m happy to report that no panic is necessary. April O’Neil has yet to retire from porn and I know this because four months ago she released the following PSA on her Instagram heyitsaprilagain.

    See! April O’Neil is not retired from porn! She’s just busy attending cosplay conventions and Phoenix Suns games to be shooting porn every day of the week. And good for her! She should enjoy some quality time to herself. She’s earned it.

    And since she has us all eating out of the palm of her hand, so it’s not like she needs to be in every porn movie. What other busty pornstar would understand the Dalek love poem you wrote for her? No one, that’s who! And that’s why April O’Neil isn’t going anywhere. Because she’s a real nerd. Not just a nerd, but the hottest nerd. Therefore she is Queen of the Nerds and has the freedom to do as much or as little porn as she wants and her popularity will not falter. Way to go April!

    Anyways, while combing through her Instagram for clues as to whether or not she’d retired from porn, it became abundantly clear that April O’Neil’s Instagram is singlehandedly one of the best things on the internet. And this is the entire purpose of this post…EVERYONE NEEDS TO FOLLOW APRIL O’NEIL ON INSTAGRAM. Because while she might not have a new gallery or scene every week, at least you’ll get your fix of April O’Neil through some sexy selfies she’s posting herself.  Continue Reading

    June 11, 2014 • Pictures & Vids, Porn • Views: 30968

  • Arianny Celeste strips for nerds

    Film Strip has finally answered the prayers of nerds everywhere. All the useless Star Trek trivia that permeates their brains can now be applied for a good cause, to get Arianny Celeste to take her clothes off.

    Unfortunately, it’s on YouTube so the striptease can only go so far. But still, Arianny Celeste is gorgeous and it’s a pretty innovative use YouTube’s annotations feature.

    Still if you’re looking for full-frontal nudity and hardcore action, why not just go back to the main page?

    January 24, 2013 • Sex News • Views: 705

  • Sex.com discusses Star Wars Episode VII

    It’s been an eventful week…

    Hurricane Sandy wreaked havoc across the eastern United States. A new Kim Kardashian sex tape emerged and then was written off as a fake. Lady Gaga and Rhianna both dressed up in weed-related costumes for Halloween.

    But really, there was no bigger news story than Disney’s 4 billion dollar acquisition of Lucasfilm and the announcement that there will be a Star Wars Episode VII Continue Reading

    November 7, 2012 • Funny, Stuff • Views: 627