The Sex.com Blog

Farrah Abraham holding her new implants prior to the surgery

I know I promised there would be no more Farrah Abraham posts but…

Backdoor Teen Mom, Farrah Abraham got new boobs on May 31st, three days after her 22nd birthday (22 is the minimum age for silicone implants). It’s her second boob job and her fourth cosmetic surgery in total.

The latest issue of In Touch has photos documenting Farrah Abraham getting her new boobs. After the natural vs fake boobs debate yesterday on the Sex.com Blog, I want to show you what a breast enlargement surgery looks like. You know, freak out the guys that voted for fake boobs.

 WARNING: THESE PICTURES MAY DISTURB YOU
Continue reading “Farrah Abraham Got New Boobs” »

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What you look like when you’re masturbating

The other day I met a woman who asked me what I did. Without missing a step I said, “I write the Sex.com Blog.”

And she replied, ”There’s a Sex.com?”

I should have known then that this woman had questionable tastes if she had never been to Sex.com. Anyways, I was like, “Yeah. It’s the most expensive domain name in the world.”

And she was like, “Yeah? What is it?”

And I was like, “It’s a free porn site in the style of Pinterest. It’s the Pinterest of free internet pornography.”

And she was like, “Porn? That’s fucking gross.” Typically women aren’t as stimulated visually as men so I wasn’t offended. Also, some porn can be fucking gross.

So after being very diplomatic with her, I had to ask, “What do you do when you masturbate?”

To which she replied, “Masturbate? No. I don’t masturbate. That’s fucking gross. Why would anyone masturbate?”

As it turns out, this woman has been alive for 33 years and never once tried flicking the old baked bean. Rather than try and explain the perks of masturbation to this woman, I took her question to heart. What motivates people to masturbate? And that’s what our latest poll is all about.  Continue reading “Why Do You Masturbate?” »

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Abella Anderson, Miami Heat fan and retired pornstar

I hate the Miami Heat. Even though this summer has been lacklustre weather-wise, watching Tim Duncan neutralize the Miami Heat‘s offense with his basketball IQ is making up for it.

Watching the NBA Finals has almost made me start to pity the Miami Heat. Every year they don’t win a championship every year with Lebron James and Dwyane Wade on the same team, it will be a disappointment of season, which is totally unreasonable. (Notice how I didn’t mention Chris Bosh?)

During the NBA season when the Miami Heat went on that huge tear, I thought about how easy it would be to root for the Heat. Now I’ve started to think that being a Heat fan isn’t all that easy because the management has bestowed their fans with unreasonable expectations for every single season until 2016.

Maybe having Lebron James gives you a chance to win an NBA Championship every year but it’s still unreasonable to expect a championship every year in the current NBA.

Anyways, trying to empathize with Miami Heat fans made me think of the sexiest Miami Heat fan of all time: Abella Anderson. (see what I did there?)

Some of you may know Abella Anderson as the pornstar that once broke a man’s dick because she was riding him too hard. Others may just know her as the naughty Latina that made some great sex videos.

It’s been just over a year since she retired from porn so we’re going to do a Porno P.I. to find out what she’s up to now and why she retired from porn.

Spoiler Alert: it’s not because she broke that guy’s dick.  Continue reading “Sup with Abella Anderson?” »

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Music Video or Lesbian Porn?

Look very carefully at these two women simulating doggystyle sex.

Now ask yourself this question: Is this a music video or lesbian porn?  Continue reading “Music Video or Lesbian Porn?” »

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It’s Monday!

I know. Sorry. It’s really not that exciting. It’s pretty miserable to be honest.

But don’t worry, we’ve found some sexy links that require no introduction or boring commentary. It’s just the Sexy Monday Links. Enjoy!

Kelsey Ann, Cybergirl of the Month

Kate Upton Boobs Bouncing on Set

Bar Refaeli in Tel-Aviv

Another Dumpy Motel Room

Christina Hendricks Hiding Her Tits

The Girls of Nuts

Beau M in Black Lingerie

Rihanna’s Instagram Fashion Show

2013 Miss USA Bikini Madness

Top 5 Game of Thrones season 3 nude scenes

Playboy Playmate Karissa Shannon has a Sex Tape

Top 10 Roleplaying Sex Videos

LET THERE BE PORN – HOTTEST GIRLS ON THE INTERNET

Nicole Aniston Nude Tanning

Christy Mack in the Shower

SEX.COM BOARD TO FOLLOW:

RAGING REDHEADS

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Just a taste of Ikea Porn

Before embracing my inner-pervert and accepting the title of “Blogger Supreme” for Sex.com, I briefly worked in at an Ikea.

Truth be told, it was a really good job. It paid a lot better than any other retail job and they provided benefits for all their employees. Occasionally we would take naps on the beds while another guy was on lookout. Did I mention that as an Ikea employee, you get all the meatballs you can eat?

All in all working for Ikea was pretty good. The only downside (and it’s not really a downside) was realizing how many identical rooms there were in the world. People wanted their homes to look exactly like the pictures in the Ikea catalog.

Again, it’s not really a downside to working at Ikea, but I always wanted to make a bootleg Ikea catalog using real people’s homes. The problem was I’ve never been invited into someone’s home. They always politely ask me to leave once they open the door. So I put my art project on hold to write sexy things for Sex.com.

Unfortunately, Just Another Ikea Catalog has figured out how to recreate the Ikea catalog within people’s homes without being politely turned away. The solution? Like all of life’s problems, it was solved with pornography.

Let’s take a look at the at scandinavian modern style furniture and accessories that people have in their homes, specifically in their amateur pornography:  Continue reading “Ikea Catalog Porn is Hilariously Sexy” »

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One of the perks of writing the Sex.com Blog is that I get to see all search terms that bring people to this blog.

It’s always nice to see people reading my musings on sex, porn, celebrities, sexy models, pornstars, sex toys, and whatever else that gets posted on this blog when they were originally searching for “The Revenge of All Ass Fucks” or “Doggystylesexinthestandingposition.com”.

I really do get a sick, voyeuristic pleasure from seeing what people have searched to find my curation of porn. As it turns out, Buzzfeed also gets sick, voyeuristic pleasure from seeing the terms that people are searching to find their porn.

Let’s find out what most people search when they search for porn:    Continue reading “The World’s Most Searched Porn Terms” »

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Sadly, there will be no tits & glass

When the world got its first look at Google Glass, everyone had the same reaction:

“Google Glass will be great for POV porn!”

Realistically, what other purpose could Google Glass possibly serve other than to provide porn fans with a mind-blowing POV Porn experience?

Unfortunately all porn has been banned off Google Glass.  Continue reading “Porn Banned On Google Glass” »

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Victoria Rae Black

Victoria Rae Black started in the adult industry as a Playboy Playmate*.

*It has come to my attention that Victoria Rae Black was not a Playboy Playmate. She just posed for them. Playboy models only get the designation of Playmate if they’re centerfolds, which Victoria Rae Black never was.

This petite, stunning chick from Milwaukee, Wisconsin then started doing hardcore porn movies. Everyone loved Victoria Rae Black, not just because she looked adorable having naughty sex on camera but because she was so good at interacting with fans.

However, I regret to inform you that one of your favorite pornstars, Victoria Rae Black, may have retired.   Continue reading “Did Victoria Rae Black Retire?” »

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The Problem with Sweatpants

Why do sweatpants always get such a bad rep? You wear sweatpants one time and everyone’s against you. It’s like people want to shame you for wanting to be as comfortable as possible.

Wearing sweatpants to work is always the worst. For some reason they aren’t considered “appropriate” or “professional”. Strangely enough, the “No Sweatpants At Work” rule not only applies to most businesses, government offices, and restaurants, it also applies to porn sets. Continue reading “The Porno Dress Code” »

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