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  • Canada Needs To Make More Porn!

    Quebec Porn Star Lanny Barby Stripping Off Red Panties Canada Needs To Make More Porn!

    Canadian Porn Star Lanny Barbie shows her patriotism

    QUESTION: Has anyone ever taken Canada seriously?

    Hahaha. The answer is of course NO.

    Why would we? Canada is basically America but colder and worse (except the free Health Care).

    Further proving their incompetence as a nation, the Canadian Radio-television Telecommunications Commission is cracking down on Toronto-based Channel Zero, which includes porn stations AOV Adult Movie Channel, AOV XXX Action Clips and AOV Maleflixxx, for not complying with the 35% Canadian Content law.

    Yes, Canada has a law that requires all their radio and TV stations to fill their schedules with at least 35% of content produced in Canada. I’ve been told by some local Canadians that this law is designed to preserve and protect Canadian culture, which makes me ask the question…Canada has culture?

    Now Canadians can have their say as to whether Channel Zero’s erotic and non-erotic channels should be renewed despite the porn they broadcast is foreign.

    So Canadians, if you want to keep porn on TV like the Neanderthals you are (c’mon porn on TV? Use the internet), then start producing your own porn that can be broadcast on these channels!

    You’re probably saying to yourself, “Eh bud. I’m just a dumb Canadian eh. How can I shoot the pornos?”

    Which is why I’ve prepared this quick guide for you.

    HOW TO SHOOT PORN EVEN IF YOU’RE A DUMB CANADIAN

    1. Get a camera
    2. Get some lights
    3. Learn how to do make-up
    4. Send out a casting call via Canadian Craigslist or Canadian Reddit
    5. Hire the hottest people willing to fuck on camera
    6. Use your free health care to get yourself and your talent tested for STDs.
    7. Turn camera on.
    8. Hit record.
    9. Begin having sex.
    10. Make sure your camera is pointed at the sex.
    11. Cum in the face.
    12. Send the footage to Channel Zero: 2844 Dundas W, Toronto, ON M6P 1Y7

    Porn shooting made so simple, even a dumb Canadian can understand it! Now go make your own damn porn Canada! I can’t believe you still consider yourself a country when you don’t even broadcast your own damn porn.

     

    March 6, 2014 • Sex News • Views: 1392

  • Rolling in My Sweet Baby?s Arms

    301078 200x300 Rolling in My Sweet Baby?s ArmsHow do you set the mood when it?s time to seduce, sensualize, and sex up your pleasure partner? Low lighting and candles are key, but the rhythm of your rocking can be magically guided by the right music choice. So you?ve stepped up to your speakers, and are browsing your sacred tunes. What to choose? Shuffle? The radio?

    If you?re looking to settle in for a long steamy session, you?re best off crafting a playlist, even if it keeps her waiting for 5 minutes, because the next 45 will be packed with far finer pleasure.
    When selecting your sexual sonic surroundings, keep the following in mind: Continue Reading

    July 16, 2012 • Sex & Dating Tips • Views: 191