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There’s a NEW Worst Porn Star Music Project – Melanie Muller

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And it’s not even a new song by Farrah Abraham.


A little while ago, NOT-A-PORN-STAR-ITS-A-LEAKED-SEX-TAPE Farrah Abraham released a laughably bad new song. Inspired by the song’s profound horribleness, Chico Dusty ran down the top 10 songs by porn stars.  For whatever reason, it seems to be a fairly common trend for porn stars to try and segue their adult celebrity into a music career.  I suppose it’s an attempt to garner mainstream credibility, but more often than not, the end result is almost inconceivably terrible.  Except More, More, More, by Andrea True because that song is really fucking dope.

To preface:  in case you didn’t realize, this summer the Fifa World Cup is taking place in Brazil.  You probably didn’t realize because the majority of our viewers are from the United States and soccer doesn’t exist in the United States.

German porn star Melanie Muller just put out a new song and accompanying music video to cheer on her home country in their upcoming battle for national soccer supremacy. The song is terrible. The video is also terrible but slightly less terrible than the song because it features a bunch of hot German babes, including Muller herself, prancing around in tight spandex soccer-themed gear.

OK, to be honest, though this song is really crappy, it’s at least vaguely catchy, which is more than can be said for Farrah Abraham’s innuendo-laden disaster of a song. Don’t take that statement as a complement, however, because I’m setting the bar extremely, extremely low.

Here are some pictures of Melanie Muller where she isn’t straying way out of her comfort zone, to get you primed up for the World Cup. I’m personally rooting for whatever country it is that is the favourite to win the World Cup, so when they win the World Cup you can say that Gil Powers tipped you off with his astounding sports predictions.

Melanie Muller is kind of a babe in like, the most classically German looking way possible:

4883312 melanie muller alias scarlet young Theres a NEW Worst Porn Star Music Project   Melanie Muller
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My name is Gil Powers. I am an extremely, extremely underrated lover and the shortest/fattest man to ever play in the NBA. I like long walks to the 7/11 and watching reality TV show marathons.

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